On the Agenda

It's that time of year....to sum up what we've done in the last 12 months.
To decide there are some things that can be improved,  others that can be strived for....and put on our list, yet again, those things that we still want, but have eluded us thus far...

The thing that most needs improvement in my Life, is my health...

Resolution # 1 Get Healthy

Since we moved and I stopped working as a Massage Therapist, I've done zero physical activity.  Do you remember the muscle pull while swatting flies incident?

I've been noticing aches and cramps that weren't there before....and a noticeable loss of flexibility....

I'm only 38. 

I spend way too much time sitting in front of the computer.

My Dad has heart issues.

I had borderline high cholesterol 3 years ago (the last time I had it checked).

Um....does anyone else see the red flags here...ding ding!!  Time to make some changes.

So, I need to drop Maggie off at school and...

Those red things are bike shorts....does anyone still wear those things? Haha!

This is for illustrative purposes only.  I wouldn't be caught dead in a pair of shorts in public :)

I just need to get my physical activity done in the morning, before email and blog checks, before excuses and obligations...I need to just start my day on a positive.

Be more regular about taking my vitamins...

...and eat more veggies.  I actually enjoy vegetables, but, I find I eat the same ones all the time.  I'd like to mix it up some kale and eggplant with my usual tomatoes and broccoli.  I can become so predictable. 

Perhaps I'll try Green Shakes like so many of you do.  If you have any advice or recipes to share I'd love to hear them! :)

My second Resolution stems from something else extremely important to me.  I've always longed to make a living as an Artist. 

I know I'm preaching to the choir here.

My Husband would love for me to contribute more financially and has politely suggested that I may be able to find a job when Maggie goes to school fulltime in 1st grade....

....but, it would be a dream come true to be able to make Art my profession, and have Chief Paint Slinger be my title :)

I think we established above, with all that health talk, just how short Life is...I want to live mine doing what I love most.

I figured I'd make it my goal to get published in a magazine. If an Art Mag takes your work seriously, than the rest of the world will too, right?!  Well, maybe not....but it's something to strive for anyways :)

Besides, it would make my Mom and Dad so proud :)

...and show Maggie that all dreams are within reach...

So, I'll create...

mail in....

...and keep my fingers crossed again and again...

Until, one day...I may be able to...

Celebrate....and you'll all be invited to party with me...heehee!

My 3rd Resolution is the one that keeps eluding me.  On the surface, it seems like a non-issue.

I mean, how could someone who doesn't have to work (yet...haha!), doesn't exercise and doesn't eat veggies not be having fun..haha!  Well, I don't have nearly as much as I should :)

I want to live in my heart more...and less in my mind....

While I have no problem laughing at myself sometimes, I have trouble in stressful situations relaxing and going with the flow.  Getting uptight and tense isn't going to help anything. Maybe just laughing at the whole thing would put me more at ease :)

I don't say yes enough to her.  She's only a kid once....and one day, she'll stop asking.

 Lazy is just way too easy for me... I believe there is definately room to do better. To try harder. 

I can put the clothes away as soon as I pull them out of the dryer (instead of letting them sit in the basket for a week).

I can write a love letter to my Hubby once a month instead of once a year.

I can cook a meal every now and then, rather than heat up a frozen dinner.

I can look in the mirror....and look past my crow's feet and gray hair....and not mourn over what I used to be.  But, appreciate who I am now and just how special she is :)

Maybe I'll finally do a self-portrait?

Well, probably not....haha!  Maybe in 2013....

Happy New Year, Blog Friends! 

Let's make it a great one!!

Big hugs,

Cameron

"Queen" or "Worker"?

Don't have a lot of time today. Have to be at work right at the start of my shift for 4 1/2 hours of massage. I was feeling a bit moody this morning (could be that I started my y'know what today) but less a crabbiness, and more like I'm in mourning of creative time with my self, free time here with you, etc. Decided it best to take out some old friends I used to consult from time to time to help give me some direction on days where I need a little nudge. I have found that they are useful to help me focus on one aspect of my life instead of stretching and stressing my mind on trying to keep up with multiple (and usually unimportant) issues for the day.

These are my Medicine Cards.....a sort of Tarot deck....designed with an emphasis on finding strength, lessons and answers from the examples in the animal kingdom. I liked the Native American look and feel of the illustrations....

So, I lit a candle, took them out from their hiding spot in my overcrowded bookshelf and spread the cards out before me. I filled my thoughts with a kind request, trying to be open and receptive to what it is I would learn today. "Why am I feeling such despair on missing out on creating this week? What do I need to know to keep from feeling this way so often?"

I drew the "Ant" card in reverse. I strongly believe in using the cards in contrary/ reverse positions, too. I shuffle my cards without looking at them, some being right side up, some upside down....letting them mingle and arrange themselves in whatever way they wish. Their position provides a lesson in whichever way they choose to present it.

I'm not so good at doing elaborate spreads and pondering many "aha's" at one time. So I just make a simple arc with all the cards, ask a question and pick a card. I read what it's meaning is in the corresponding book....and let the guidance seep into my consciousness....hopefully, giving me a chance to improve the way I'm currently handling a given situation.

In this case, I was feeling torn away from what I love to do, by what I have to do....like I'm losing ground when I don't keep up my posts or have something new to share.

"Ant" signifies Patience....and in the reverse, is telling me that impatience can be a silly thing. Greed and Fear stem from impatience. There is a natural order in Life, and not trusting it or myself can cause this unease.... Stress and urgency are unnecessary when relating to my art. Don't make mountains out of anthills! The art I want to create should be born of happiness and magic....not fear of being forgotten or a set number of pieces on my website that suddenly makes me "legitimate"

I feel a smile returning to my face....and better yet, to my heart, right now! :) Happy creating to all of you. Thank you for being a comforting shoulder, eager ear and providing boundless inspiration!

Promises Kept

The month is quickly coming to an end, which in turn, means Project Hubby will also be wrapping up it's designated time frame. What an amazing, little journey this became....originally just a means to give my Sweetie a little extra attention (on a budget!), who suspected I'd be getting so much more out of it? If you knew something, you should have said something :)

There were times when I didn't have the little card waiting for him to discover in the morning....(because, quite frankly, I didn't have that day's card made yet...oops!) I'd get busy with my daughter and stress over something small, and for a brief moment, I'd think, " I did pretty good for a couple weeks, I can let one day slide. My Hubby will forgive me." ...and that's when I would suddenly find the time (and, somehow, the serenity) to create a little something for him to come home to.

I think I'm growing up a bit (gulp!).....because, in the past, I would have flaked halfway through...or, rather, not even taken on a month-long project because it would have been too hard. But, I'm a new Me when it comes to my Hubby...I've let him down in the past, and making this dedication to him...this February Celebration....needed to be as serious to me as my love for him.....

So, I perservered....

Yesterday was one of those days. SoI thought that I'd use the old refrigerator poem magnets that used to be so popular...oh, about a decade ago! You have any of those? I was getting a little bored of cards and needed something different.

I fished them out from their dusty perch on top of the fridge and opened the container. There were over 3 sets of random words piled inside....

......and a Love Poem....from my Sweetheart....from years past..... tucked in there, too.

I read those simple, honest words and my heart warmed and fuzzified (yes, it's a word...at least, in my world). Doesn't it figure that when you go out of your way to do something for someone else's benefit and pleasure.....you are rewarded in many ways. This was one. A little something from my Hubby to me that I would have never remembered was in there....probably would have never found....except for my search to use another method of conveying my affection.

I can see why they've been sitting up there for so long....it really is a pain to sift through all those tiny magnets, vision blurring from the sea of red, black and white!

Yet, despite my impaired eyesight, I managed to find this poem inside all those pieces.

And, yes, that is a toaster oven pan it's stuck to....our fridge is covered in Little Girl drawings, pictures, toys, etc. I know it's not the most romantic, not to mention, it doesn't stand up well on the piano...heehee, but it was portable. I wanted to make sure I put it somewhere where he wouldn't miss it. My daughter and I also bought him some flowers to replace those from Valentine's that have since withered away.

It was so cute. Hubby came home that night, our girl and I met him in the foyer for Welcome Home kisses and hugs. He gave us our share and then turned to me and said, "Where's my little card today? I looked all over for it, but couldn't find it....and I really needed it today."

When he rounded the corner, he saw the poem and the flowers. "The day's not over, yet!" I replied.

There was another reward for my good deeds.

I did, however, make sure I had a card out and ready for him this morning...since he had to wait so long yesterday....

I wrote about how I found his little poem, and all the mushy stuff that comes when feelings are known, hearts are given and promises are kept.

Learning from Mischief

So, let me set the scene.

I'm trying to use today to actually do some art for artsake. I have the whole morning to sit down and paint whatever strikes my fancy....maybe a quick sketch of a fairy house to go with the "Home" theme, maybe use some of those photos from the recent shoot...."oh, yes, I could use the reference photo of the owl I took at the Renaissance Faire last year...now, where did I put it?"

"Meow"

"Not now, Mischief, Mommy's looking for something. You can sit on my lap when I get back on the computer."

Mischief goes to the couch and jumps up. Button, our persnickety younger kitty quickly bats her back down. Mischief paces in front of her.

I pull out one of my daughter's old baby blankets from the linen closet.

"Here Mischief, I'll put your own blanket up here so Her Highness doesn't have to share. There you go. Just for you. Now you can both be comfy."

I go about searching and laying out all the possible things I can work on. I go in the other room thinking about how fast the morning has turned into afternoon, and I still haven't really done anything. What will I share on my blog today...oh, no, I better hurry.....stress slowly elevates, impatience starts to set in.... I begin to fret that I've wasted so much time. How could I let this happen? My great day of opportunity takes a nosedive toward dissappointment and self doubt!

Then I walk back out to the livingroom and see THIS.

I laughed out loud. Suddenly life wasn't so serious....it certainly isn't to Button. She abandoned her side of the couch while I wasn't looking, obviously thinking that Mischief's blanket (and Mischief herself) looked much more comfortable!

This same cat, who not a moment before, was refusing to let Mischief join her on her side!

And, so, I decided to learn a lesson from Mischief (I know, her name doesn't quite fit her....it hasn't since she was about a year old, but by then, it was what she went by)

and take things in stride. Life may not go the way you want it all the time (or, at all, for that matter), but if you just don't worry, keep a positive attitude and an open heart, you may get what you were trying for all along! Button is lucky to have a companion like Mischief.

It reminds me to be grateful to those who share my life with me. Especially when I'm persnickety, too!!

Ah, animals and children....what great teachers they are!

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!